08/08/2005

and it begins, the last week to stay in springfeild. i really have to say that it wtill feels like i have just get hre yesterday. i still remember those sad moments, where i was thre to send the other interns on their way here while i was stuck there and got to drive back with sorrow remembering my beloved people to get to watch the U.S SIFE National Comp. and Exposition, one event that i really wnated to go most..has been listed in my 'must go' since i went to last year's SIFE world cup. they were there, grabbing each and every opportunity available, when i was stranded in shah alam, making hell lots of phone calls to the embassy...asking if my visa was ready...just because i have a beautiful name, that unfortunately same as a hated man of the land..my chance of a lifetime got to be thrown ou to f the window..what an ufair world it is..full of pretentious bastards and paraniods.Living in uncertainty...especially regarding this type of matter was a serious pain in my ass. still remember the moment azuan and zamil cooled me down..when i was watching them..leaving me with extreme joy and happiness, i was about to burst.it has been such a long time since my last tears. i just hate it when i always got to wait longer to get whatever i want in life. no matter in any part of it. study, cerrier, lovelife, skills, whatever shits they would be...i sometimes wonder...what sin did i commit to gain this kind of punishment? when i want something so badly, but i will always ended up be the person to see the others to walk away with them .. damn!

today is not really a day where there were lots of things to talk about..just anuar and me cooked for all of us(the girls too...diornag masak nasik)..had talapia sweet sour(ustaz's recepie)..chapchai(mine) and telor dadar (mine too)...i later came here(p.c lab) did some stuff, went back, watch t.v, 8pm frank bannett came had some chat, walked to dillons somewhere near 10pm..got back, had white rice+chap chai+ayam masak lemak kuning..and now i am back here...

wonder how i am going to face tomorrow...

imran